Why blowjobs are more intimate than sex

We all know that I’m a fan of giving blowjobs. We all know that I only recently came to appreciate them, as well. But as I started giving more blowjobs, I started thinking about them more. I also continued to date and things came to a point when I accepted a date with someone that outright said that he did not want to have sex with me because of my STD. Which I understood. It wasn’t like I was going to pressure him to do something that he didn’t feel comfortable doing. Even though full-on sex is my favorite thing.

I wanted to see him again, since he was an awesome date and we got along really well. So I offered a blowjob. But then I started thinking about it. Blowjobs are an investment in a relationship. One I didn’t really want to make without any reciprocation. Especially when I thought about actually giving a blowjob to completion. The last time I did it, it was with someone that I was very comfortable with, very into and very much wanted to please. This guy is only a little better than a stranger and our relationship is going to be composed of about two or three dates. So yes, I didn’t feel ready to do all of that for someone that is going to be so little invested in me.

It got me thinking as to why I was so willing to have sex with a dude, but the thought of giving him a BJ was just too much. The truth is that, for me anyway, giving a man a blowjob, and experiencing their body like that is really intimate. And while I am pretty willing to try out blowing a guy when it is leading to sex, just the act of the blowjob alone, to completion, with no chance of getting off myself, seems staggeringly uncomfortable.

When I fall in love, I generally don’t worry about what I’m getting out of things, when I offer to do something for the person that I love. But I am not in love with this person. I am concerned about what I will be getting for what I’m giving and if you ask anyone that knows me, they will tell you that this is often not my concern, no matter who I am with. It’s come to a point where, I realize the true value of casual sex and if it’s just going to be casual, I want something out of it, too. It’s only fair and I see no reason why I should settle for something else.

As for the man that I promised the blowjob, I have a date with him this weekend and I’m still undecided as to what I should do. Regardless, I think I’ve pretty much ruled out his blowjob if there will be nothing happening my genitals before or afterward. I hate to disappoint people, but I also hate to feel constantly disappointed. And if there’s one thing I can bring out of man, it’s a never-ending ability to disappoint me.

Update: So, as it would happen, some things did happen to my genitals and he did get a blowjob from me, but not to completion. Even though I was pretty satisfied with the encounter, I drew the line at finishing him off. I decided for myself that the next time I do that, I’m going to be seriously dating them. It’s entirely too intimate for me to feel comfortable doing on the regular with people that I’m just not that into. So yeah, there will be some work involved for me to give a blowjob to completion.

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