“They don’t look that big…”


[Image description: A person with long blonde hair in an advertisement for a Wonderbra. She is a wearing a white bra and looking directly at the camera. A bubble to her right reads, “Up to a G cup”.]

When speaking about illness,  it should always be made a point to talk about invisible illness. Telling someone that they don’t look sick or sick enough is ridiculous and downright fucking annoying. Don’t assume you know someone’s health because you can see their exterior. And whatever you do, don’t belittle someone for expressing pain just because you can’t see it.

When someone asks me about my upcoming surgery I inevitably say that it’s a breast reduction. I don’t feel like I should have to lie about it or hide it or be embarrassed about it. But sometimes I think I should just lie or make something up because it seems that unless someone has gotten a breast reduction or knows someone in their immediate circle of family or friends that have had one, they are completely dismissive, ignorant assholes about it.

I’ve heard people tell me my breasts don’t look large enough to be causing me all of these problems so often I have to pause and stop myself from throat punching them and anyone standing near them. Attention everyone, whether you have breasts or not, you do not need to have breasts the size of beach balls in order for them to cause you problems. Does anyone find it logical that I am paying for my own reduction eighteen days before I start grad school for funsies? I’m not really having back, neck, and shoulder problems. I’ve just been trying to get a breast reduction for the last two years because I was really bored.

Come on, people, be reasonable here.

And really, do you think you’re the first person to tell me that I don’t look that big? Or that I shouldn’t get the reduction because smaller breasts are bad? Or I should put more thought into it? Or I should make sure I get my protein? Wait… different rant.

I’ve heard everything under the sun when it comes to breasts and making them less painful. But the idea that I don’t look big enough to warrant surgery annoys me more than anything else. I’m not lying about my pain. I’m not making this up to get attention. I do far crazier shit that warrants attention. Seriously.

When it comes to illness, some of them are invisible. Just because someone doesn’t look sick, don’t assume that they’re fine. Just because it doesn’t seem that my breasts are large enough to cause me this much pain, don’t assume that they’re not. And really, if I tell you something, your first thought shouldn’t be that I’m making it up.

Want to do something to help? Contribute to my GoFundMe page and help me pay for the surgery that will stop me from being in daily pain.

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